When I took care of my mom,

& kept the garden trimmed & watered,

& cared for the animals,

& cleaned up around the house,

& washed the dishes nightly,

& put them away,

& swept and mopped the floors,

& washed all of the laundry:

Mom’s and J’s bedding, mom’s clothes, bath towels, kitchen towels, then folding towels for the entire house..

& organizing moms’ clothes,

& putting things back where they belong..

I never had any expectations,

& I never asked for anything in return.

Didn’t want money.

I didn’t even want a ‘thank you.’

Just acknowledgement..

even if it came in a silent form.

When a family member receives a diagnosis (like Alzheimer’s); the role that they previously assumed in that family- can no longer be fulfilled.

The roles change in families, dynamics change, relationships change, they change dramatically.

Expectations are no longer realistic.

The person with Alzheimer’s may have held the role of cleaning, cooking, used to be able to have meaningful conversations, used to understand what things are, what they’re used for, or even how to use them.

The person will cease to remember familiar places.

They will forget what your face looks like. They will forget what your name is. They will forget who their husband is. They will forget who their children are. They will forget their children’s birthdays. They will forget their anniversary; and other important dates– (in the past, they’ve cried when you forgot).

They will forget their favorite food.

They will forget what their own birthday is, they will forget where they were born..

They will also no longer know how to dress themselves, wash themselves, they will slowly lose their vision, will forget how to use their hands. They will forget how to use their legs.

They will become bedridden.

They will forget how to chew their food..

Yes, life goes on- but not quite yet.

They will require a lot more than a single person can manage on their own- and realistically the cost of care will come with the real risk abuse actually occurring- and the cost of care at home- could cost at the minimum $1,600 a week.

The alternative:

It is the responsibility of the spouse and the adult children to help take on responsibilities.

My mom is still your spouse.

Sickness and health.

Does not mean:

accelerate their sickness.

Does not give J the right to start making changes on my mother, now that she is too weak to make sense of what he is doing, and why, he’s made a MONSTROUSLY egregious error by pulling the rug out from under my mother.

Just like he knew mom had been diagnosed with moderate stages of Alzheimer disease- and he lied and said they found nothing, he knew she had a infection and he left that infection go untreated for years– causing it to spread all the way up the right side of her sinus. Now that same negligent person– is going to turn around and retaliate against me for opening my fucking mouth? He’s trying to say that this thing that I’ve done by helping my mother- was done in malice? He’s turning something good that I’ve done- into something bad.

So now he says my mom can’t talk to me? He says that I’m dangerous? He says that I’m a piece of shit? He puts a wedge between my mom and i telling her all this crazy crap he just made up- tells my family members things so that they trade their feelings towards me- nobody had seen me in years. And they still vouched for John just on his word alone..?

I’m disappointed in my brothers.

& I’m disappointed in my uncles.

John went and got a restraining order against me because he wanted me out?

I think I’ve got an audio of John saying I wouldn’t mind her being here, if she didn’t call the cops on me.

What J filed was a fraudulent application.

He did it because he hates me.

Because I caught something— that he had known about, and refused to address- he ignored mom need for medical care- abd if he didn’t want to address it promptly, nobody else is allowed to intervene ?

And should somebody ever try to go over his authority and say so and my mom’s medical care – then he’s going to retaliate against that person ??

‘Someone’ has some problems controlling anger.. and likely has no idea how to stop himself unless he gets his ear, because if he doesn’t get his way, he’s going to turn it up, and they both get more and more ..

So j didn’t take my mom to doctor by for almost 2 years. He did nothing and because I was proactive in getting mom medical help- John was upset because he got caught? He said that I did not do any of this, with his involvement, I involved him every fucking step of the way, for God sake, he even drove her to each surgery that she needed!

What a lying son of a bitch, I’ve got written statements from each and ever doctor who had seen my mother- and they each stated that her husband was present with her for the appointments.

I don’t know how much more involved can one possibly get? J had two fucking years to do something and he didn’t. He didn’t care about the changes in my mother. He didn’t care about investigating it more. All he wanted to do was scream and yell at her as her condition continued to get worse.

And because that person was me , I’m not allowed to be proper or someone who acts responsibly I’m not allowed to have that reality.

Nope. Not in J’s world.

So now I’m the piece of shit and my mom is not allowed to be near me and my mom is not allowed to talk to me. She’s not allowed to see me ever again –

And doing this, removes all oversight.

so that I would never be able to help my mom, and the last year and a half was entirely J covering up for the abuse and neglect that he perpetrated.

And somehow, I’m getting blame for the BULLSHIT HE HAS DONE .. ?

I wasn’t gonna say this, but I will. I noticed Jon was SA- ing My mother- removing me removes oversight without the threat of me calling the police on him for that either.

Just because he’s married to

Mom does not mean he can do that with her whenever HE wants.

It doesn’t mean he can do it when my mom is thoroughly confused and doesn’t know what the fuck is going on while he’s doing it with her that is a sexual assault that is rape.

It doesn’t mean trick her into getting naked by telling her she’s gonna take a shower then half ass not even wash her or let her get a drop of water on herself and then yell at her when she tries to get her clothes on— because you want her to lay in the bed so you can SA her.

Being naked does not give consent.

My mom would come to my room on those nights crying, naked, and confused-

And I would dress her in either a nightgown or her clothes for the day. And she stayed with me in the spare bedroom.(in Calvin’s old bed) he slept in that room next to each other until you left for work.. then we were up and we would make breakfast together. We would watch the news. I would clean up after breakfast. I made sure the animals were all fed and the house was cleaned up. We would go out into the yard, and water the plants together.

And Billy was outside because you let him out when you would leave for work- together we be outside, trying to get him to come in.

J took my mother away from me because he knew that she was all that I had.

He made my mom abuse me, in her confused state as if my mom was some sort of puppet on strings.

I love my mother, more than anything. I could never do the things John alleges.

NEVER.

He’s just saying it, though— (because he hates Rebecca… and it’s better for ‘John’ if mom hates Rebecca too).

Being someone’s husband does not them the right to take advantage of someones confused state, manipulating your spouses beliefs, instilling fear: without any real reason for her to be fearful-

J uses his status as moms’ husband inappropriately he’s abusing his title and misusing his position- to suffocate my mothers autonomy, he abuses his power over her- and he weapons my mother against me just because he can…

J drains my mother, he has made her blind to her own individuality, he has stolen her emotionally and fires her to do what he says.

John tortures my mother, and to him, her performance justifies why he believes it’s okay for him to control my mom’s relationship with me. LIE to my mom’s brothers, so that they will support him in the silent abuse.

I am my mothers only daughter-

I am telling the truth.

I love my mom.

But John spreads misinformation about me, to my brothers and my family, John tells lies about me to every person with his reach- he veered them away from me- so that I would not have their support.

He told my mother things that were not true, he meddled with our mother-daughter relationship.

He constantly broke down my mothers love for me, he influenced her to have negative feelings, he did this because he knew my mom was sick and he used her disability for his own benefit, he used my mom‘s confusion, disability, and diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease, to manipulate my mother to pull away from me.

That is the legal definition of isolation.

In his own words, he said he was “Trying to create a separation”

The only reason J would ever want to do this is not because that there was any reason to fear me and it’s not because I was “dangerous” at all …

It’s because- “J” is committing estate fraud.

That is the legal definition of elder financial abuse.

Taking my mother away from me does not protect my mother, but rather satisfies ‘J’s’ own selfish interests, and his need for control.

Not because there is any real threat occurring, but because “j” is cruel.

He has no conscience, no integrity, no empathy, and he doesn’t care about how much harm he’s done to my mother by forcing her to reject me from her life.

And live with the idea that she’ll never see me. My mom is too fragile, to endure that kind of pain. She just lost Billy.. and now she’s just lost her only daughter.. and her best friend..

My mom’s mental health is shattered because of the way j has treated her, he is actively crushing her will to live- my moms husband refuses to accept that my mom has a daughter will not allow anyone to mistreat her mom.

My mom has to grieve our relationship because the person she married has no respect for her and he will never understand what it means to LOVE.

Just because J has the title as my moms husband- it does not give him the right to improperly use court process to get rid of someone from your life- especially if there is no abuse occurring.

He filed a DVRO- after, (Judge Tiffany Tai) was very clear that restraining orders are not used to evict people. And he is in the wrong type of court

– if that’s the core of what he wanted- he would need to go to civil, (not family court)

Judge Tiffany Tai asked J if I had committed any violent or physical abuse .. and J denied it, he didn’t even mention anything of the sort ..

I would think that it would be more likely an important thing to mention, especially if the judge is asking him is there any other forms up of you believe that Rebecca is committing ? John never once stated that I was physically abusive against him or my mom-

(But at home, John terrorized me and he was determined to teach my mom how to act out to give the appearance that she hated me, in front of whom ever investigated any reports I’ve made. And together they fooled the cops..

The cops didn’t fucking believe me at all because the two of them both stood next to each other as John said we both don’t want her here we want her out!

J would shout at me- at the top of his goddamn lungs:

You’re a criminal! You’re dangerous! get away from us! We don’t want you here! You are inciting violence! you are an evil bad person! Shut the fuck up! Your an idiot beyond words”

But—when judge Tiffany Tai asked J if I had committed physical abuse toward him or mom-

J denied It, he stated that the only thing he was alleging was that I had stolen money by using my mother’s credit card.

Hold on I’ll get into that—.

John said i did not commit physical abuse against him or my mother.

The judge denied John’s request for a restraining order- finding that I had not committed any fraud.

The allegation was that a single transaction was made on my mothers bank card- the transaction was completed at my mother‘s request the card said my mother‘s name on it-

My mom complained that she never had any money on her so I asked her if she would pay my registration with her card. I would give her money and she could tuck it away- and that’s why my mom wanted to do …

John always held all their money- he never gave my mother any access to it. He didn’t give her an allowance. He left her literally pennyless at home without a car.

It was wrong of him to do that to my mother that itself that case alone pointed to evidence of J financially abusing my mother.

John’s application for the elder abuse restraining order was denied on:

March 18, 2025. 

John filed a domestic violence restraining order against me on: July 11, 2025

Suddenly, J made some serious allegations- that I had physically abused him or my mother???

For someone to say that something so intensely violent had occurred is just mind blowing- it really frightened me that he’s alone with my mother.

There is something very wrong with a person that would conjure allegations so vulgar, blatantly false- just to get his the ex parte, and the temp restraining order granted— and the part John loves so much about that order is that was able to order me to move out immediately.

Because rather than filling for an eviction.. J preferred seeing me cringe.

J uses the court to further his abuse towards me.

Just because j is my mom’s husband- doesn’t mean he has the right to do what he’s done, and to avoid accountability by lying about me before he got caught.

Using a DVRO as a tool to evict.

A d isolate. Motivated by estate fraud.

But that is exactly what j said he was going to do, and I gave him enough rope to hang himself ..

he even said out loud,

on his own omission,

and its been documented.

I prove it.

(My beloved mother, she was my best friend. I mourn for her and she is still alive- (not just because losing her too of Alzheimer’s disease- but because every day without her is the equivalent of death. & it should not be this way.)

But it is this way, because of my mom’s husband,

(whose name, I’m just going to call: ‘J’)

‘J’ isolating my mother from me is wrong, it’s absurd, it’s fucking wicked.

J wants to control the narrative

Because he hates me.

He holds a resentment towards me-

‘J‘ stated himself:

“For 30 years Ive put up with this shit,

it ends today”

So now John uses court applications inappropriately and intentionally. By erase me.

Making false allegations, is a crime.

And doing – in order to keep me away from my mother- under the threat of being arrested- shows you have something to hide and you’re running from something… (because why else)?

J has ALWAYS said how much he wanted me to spend the rest of my life in jail.

So he could go tell my family members that I’m a “Piece of shit” or a “criminal”

(Oh for fucks sake, two drug charges- is absolutely not the equivalent of violence)

Drug charges are victimless crimes.

It was 13 years ago..

A lot has changed despite J acknowledging the reality of who I am, today.

I can tell everybody j’s actual reasons for why he wants me in jail.. I could tell everybody.. i could quote exact words..

But not today… i’ll just transcribe all that for my appeal.. not because I have a vendetta or not because I harbor any hate– but because I’m losing time with my mom, and I don’t think I could ever forgive myself if I don’t save her.

J’s mind really is sick.

J wants me in jail so badly, and for immature reasons.. mostly because J cannot take accountability for his actions- his procrastination and negligence has caused a huge amount of damage- and he lacks the ability to own it… instead—

‘J’ would be standing there still blaming me…

(If not blaming me, then realizes that he was wrong, but still chose to bounce ideas off my mom- (whose brain is no longer functioning) bouncing ideas off her- out loud- how he could blame it on something else or blame it on me make an excuse for why it happened…so that he could escape accountability.

Which is basically like watching ‘J’ rationalize something, that isn’t something that can be hashed-

He was the only one who had the knowledge of what happened and the power to prevent anything bad from happening — you can’t go back and blame it on somebody else after the fact.

Ive heard everything that ‘J’ was going to do; before he even did it.

I recorded it, I’ve recorded the pre-meditation, and then I recorded the manipulation, the undue influence. I recorded him stating his motives, and why he was going to do what he was doing- and the underlying goal…

I’ve even recorded him saying that he intended to abuse core process…

He goofed up and told the cops.

He also goofed, and lied on his application for a DVRO.

Because I went back and I checked with the sheriffs department- John’s allocations do not match up with his dates and they did not happen. at all.

It’s already been documented.

that ship has sailed, you can’t backpedal on allegations you filed, stated the police came, and that event actually never happened…

Each and every allegation John made up- and the police have no record of it.

That’s what you call a dumb criminal.

I retain recordings of ‘J’ putting on his fake act- creating unnecessary drama, dragging my mother into it too..

Him getting her to participate in the act- (and she did. through her own confusion, and a little because of her own fear of J.

Her fear- not towards me, but towards J.. and what he’d do if she didn’t do what he told her to do).

‘J’ made a scene, numerous, numerous, times, shouting at me (out of nowhere):

“get away from us!”

He chanted the same words over and over, acting as if I was doing something wrong- when I actually wasn’t.

And my poor mom..

Had to witness this, night after night..

‘J’ tried to get me to break my character, …. But I wouldn’t break, under any circumstance.

(I am not impulsive, and I can control myself, unlike ‘J’: who has unresolved and uncontrollable anger issues)

So ‘J’ stole my phone, the phone that held evidence of him committing abuse.

The next morning ‘J’ went to the courthouse, he filed false allegation in a DVRO- knowing that I would not be able to defend myself against.

J is a sick person.

J’s mind is sick.

J isolates my mom from me,

I am my mom’s only daughter, and j did this for no reason: other than to retaliate against me, for reporting him – and even though he lied his way out of it each time he still got the DVRO against me to fulfill his own his self interest to erase me.

J acted purely out of hatred towards me.

I never did any of things that you allege that I’ve done.

(Go find another spouse,

if that’s whats what is important to you)

If you can’t and don’t want to be with her, just as I’ve heard you say—

You have no intention to provide meaningful support and care for my mother– Your motives are clearly are not geared to taking on this responsibility appropriately- then go, find someone, LEAVE.

GO LIVE YOUR LIFE.

He said:

It makes him “grind his teeth”

that means he was focused on irritation, rather than my effort & the care that I gave.

If he was grateful, he would notice what I’m doing,

not nitpick about how I do it.

It also ties back to control —

Some people can’t acknowledge

good from others

because it makes them feel less powerful.

So rather than appreciate,

He expressed annoyance.

That shows his inability to appreciate.

Inability to value

It shows how much he devalued me.

He spoke from a personal perspective of how he felt about himself.

But he projected that anger and frustration

He felt about his own pathetic self.

He devalued me. to my brothers, to my uncles, and to my mother.

He turned my brothers away from me their entire lives.

They’ve never even had a chance to have a relationship with me as an adult.

Then he did the same thing to my sick mother, taking advantage of her confusion, and replacing trust, with unnecessary fear, and isolating her from her own child, because he has plans.

To continue abusing my mother,

Without any oversight,

No one watching his “bad behavior”

No one to call the cops on his ass

When he commits the assault that

He falsely accused me of doing.

Every accusation that John has ever made- and every fucking word out of ‘J’ mouth is the closest thing that you will EVER get to a confession of his own GUILT.

God have mercy on you.

There’s more… but at this point-

I prefer to hold many truths inside;

for my own strength.